I was in the office, using our super-duper powerful stapler. The sound of it firing the staple through paper sounds a little like a gun shot. Jackson was in the room with me, on the floor playing with something. "That scared me!" he said the first time I used it. The next time I warned him, "Ok, Jackson, here comes the loud noise again." Bang! it went. "Oh," he said with a proud smile, "that time it only scared my eyes."
Davis: I think I want two jobs when I grow up. Actually, I think I want to quit a job.
Jackson (3 1/2yo): Let's pretend you're a good mommy and I am a Star Light.
Mommy (32yo): Ok, Jackson. (to myself) I wonder what a Star Light is? ...And hey, what did you just say?
Davis (6yo): Daddy, Mommy got into a car crash today.
Daddy: She did, huh?
Davis: ummm... (pause, think, think, think) November Fools!!
Aunt Ming, hearing a commotion from the other room said, "Jackson, are you hitting Baby Weston?" To which Jackson answered, "Not anymore!"